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Loading ...Dark were those days, without your sight.
When I was in darkness, you gave me light.
You gave me strength 2 make life bright.
Thank you so much PHILIPS TUBELIGHT
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of man your wife would have preferred.
I only use deodorant under one arm, so I know what I would have smelled of.
Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.
Borrow money from pessimists–they don’t expect it back
Minds are like Parachutes. They work best when open.
My Reality Check bounced.
Why do farts smell? For benefit of the deaf.
WOMAN: The most efficient money reducing agent known to man-kind!
Do you ever notice that when you’re driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a maniac?
Don’t spend $2 to dry-clean a shirt. Donate it to the Salvation Army instead. They’ll clean it, put it on a hanger. Next morn buy it back for 50p.
This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 20 dog, seconds dog! … Now read without the word dog.
God made man and then rested. God made women and then no one rested.
News: 3 Chimps escaped from the zoo… 1 was caught watching tv… another playing football and the third one was caught reading this txt message
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Why don’t men often show their true feelings?
- Because they don’t have any. -
Q: What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?
A: About 45 pounds!! -
Q: How many men does it take to change a toilet roll?
A: We don’t know. Never happens. -
Q: Why do mountain climbers rope themselves together?
A: To prevent the sensible ones from going home. -
Q: What is the difference between in-laws and outlaws?
A: Outlaws are wanted. -
Q: What do you get when you put three ducks in a box?
A: A box of quackers.
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Time is a marvellous healer but is a complete failure as a beautician.
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When a man talks dirty to a woman, it’s sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it’s £1.50 per minute
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Never let a man’s mind wander, it’s too little to be out on it’s own
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I’ve used up all my sick days, so I’m calling in dead.
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I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn’t looking good either.
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The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.
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The fact that no one understands you doesn’t mean you’re an artist.
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I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.
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I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
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Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
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Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will whiz on your computer.
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Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
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The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first.
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Don’t take life too seriously; no-one gets out alive.
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It might look like I’m doing nothing, but at the cellular level I’m really quite busy.
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A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
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Is there another word for synonym?
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Marriage is a three ring circus: an engagent ring, a wedding ring, and suffering
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ALGEBRA: A weapon of math destruction.
